It has been a while since I posted a mailbag joke, but this one passed the test:
A Virginia State trooper pulled a car over on I-64 about 2 miles south of the Virginia/West Virginia state line. When the trooper asked the driver why he was speeding, the driver said he was a magician and juggler and was on his way to Beckley, WV to do a show at the Shrine Circus. He didn’t want to be late. The trooper told the driver he was fascinated by juggling and said if the driver would do a little juggling for him then he wouldn’t give him a ticket. He told the trooper he had sent his equipment ahead and didn’t have anything to juggle. The trooper said he had some flares in the trunk and asked if he could juggle them. The juggler said he could, so the trooper got 5 flares, lit them and handed them to him. While the man was juggling, a car pulled in behind the patrol car. A drunken good old boy from West Virginia got out, watched the performance, then went over to the patrol car, opened the rear door and got in. The trooper observed him and went over to the patrol car, opened the door asking the drunk what he thought he was doing. The drunk replied, “You might as well take my ass to jail, cause there ain’t no way I can pass that sobriety test.”
For those of you blessed enough to receive the latest and greatest electronics as gifts this Christmas season, please remember to NOT throw away your old computers and mobile phones. Recycle them responsibly.
On behalf of Darryl and his family, “THANK YOU!” Between PayPal donations and cash gifts, we were able to raise over $2,000 for Darryl and his family this year.
As you know, I believe private charity is superior to government programs. To that end, I ask all of you to dig in deep this year and help. We have a friend in need. My good friend Darryl Buchannon was instrumental during my 2010 campaign, but he has recently fallen on hard times. He wants to give his family a great holiday season this year. Every bit counts! Click here to give, because you never know when you may fall on hard times and need a little help yourself!
Today marks the 225th anniversary of the 1787 Continental Congress signing the United States Constitution in Philadelphia.
“The two enemies of the people are criminals and government, so let us tie the second down with the chains of the Constitution so the second will not become the legalized version of the first.” — Thomas Jefferson
Now we just need to elect a slate of legislators and a President who intend to uphold their oath to defend the Constitution against all enemies, foreign and domestic.
This showed up in my mailbag today. Funny regardless of whether or not it is true, but according to Snopes, it is true!
This is a good one!!
Look at the two pictures; then scroll down
This is an actual letter sent to a man named Ryan DeVries regarding a pond on his property. It was sent by the Pennsylvania Department of Environmental Quality, State of Pennsylvania . This guy’s response is hilarious, but read the State’s letter before you get to the response letter, you won’t stop once you start.
This is an actual letter: State of Pennsylvania ‘s letter to Mr. DeVries:
SUBJECT: DEQ … File No.97-59-0023; T11N; R10W, Sec 20; Lycoming County
Dear Mr. DeVries:
It has come to the attention of the Department of Environmental Quality that there has been recent unauthorized activity on the above referenced parcel of property. You have been certified as the legal landowner and/or contractor who did the following unauthorized activity:
Construction and maintenance of two wood debris dams across the outlet stream of Spring Pond.
UPDATE: A circuit court judge has ordered Brandon Raub’s release. More details here.
Question: What do all of these things have in common?
- Suppression of free speech
- Thought crime punishment from the fictional book 1984
- Political prisoner status from the cold war era U.S.S.R.
- Warrantless arrest and imprisonment
Answer: They all remind me of Brandon Raub.
Even if I do not agree 100% with everything Brandon says and believes, I support his right to have and express his opinions. The fact that he is being illegally held against his will in the very city I live in makes me sick to my stomach. This is not the last I will have to say about this topic. More to come.
This was in the mailbag this morning (thanks, Sid!). I am a geek, I love auctions, and I fight in the political realm. This billboard hits two out of three!
After last week’s announcement regarding politics, some of my friends, family, and colleagues asked whether I am running for office and if so, which office I am running for. Just to clarify things, I am not currently running for any office. For now, my goal is to simply be active and involved again after taking some time off to focus on family, business, and tasks I had postponed for my 2010 campaign.
My plan is to help promote liberty and freedom whenever and wherever I can. When future opportunities to run for office present themselves, I will evaluate them as they come up.
I am humbled by the outpouring of support and encouragement. Thank you!
On Saturday, July 7th, 2012, the SW Virginia Tea Party held their Independence Day celebration in Abingdon. I discussed putting my comments online for Mr. Trivett to read, so here they are!
Ladies and Gentlemen,
My name is Stuart Bain, and I hail from Salem, Virginia. My family and I were just recently redistricted into the 9th Congressional District, so I appreciate the warm welcome and look forward to learning the lay of the land.